023; it’s funny you said we’d never make it but look how far we’ve come

Updating last week’s drawing work.

I did this on the 11th. It needed a lot of help too. I’m simply clueless when it comes to drawing glasses.

I spent 2 hours or something drawing the outlines of this piece of cloth. It’s pinned to the wall. I worked on it for about 10-11 hours in total; 4 on the 14th and 6-7 more on the 16th. It was really tiring but it was all worth the time spent, made me realize what I’m capable of if I’m patient enough to see through to the end. This didn’t need much help, and it wasn’t an option. Hahaha. On the 14th, my teacher called in sick and couldn’t come, so a substitute teacher came, she didn’t help me AT ALL. Then on the 16th I pretty much worked on what had been done, and my teacher only gave a few suggestions. I love how it looks like it pops out (at least for me). I’m so proud of this. :-)

Still a work in progress, it has taken the most time ever. On the 18th I spent almost 4 hours doing the outlines of the real lantern. It’s just never easy for me. :( I almost gave up too. Then I came back on the 19th and this is what I came home with. Nothing much was added except for the shading and tiny little details of the material’s surface. Can you guess how much time I spent on the second day? Mhmmm, I worked on it from 9 am until about 5.30 pm. I guess that makes 8 hours and 30 minutes, which makes it almost 13 hours in total. Considering it’s now only 5% finished, I might have to work on it forever. Le sigh. :( My teacher said it’s okay, he said it took him almost 2 weeks when he first did this lantern. I don’t know how to feel about that..

Anyhow, my first drawing course was done! I’m taking a one week break to work for this year’s German Camp. I’ll be working as staff from Wednesday to Friday, we’re leaving for the camp site at Saraburi tomorrow morning! I haven’t packed yet, haha. When I come back I’ll sign up for a new drawing course first thing. :-)

So, I guess this will be the last post for a few days. See you when I get back! <3

004; i’m being taken over by the fear

Hello again! I had drawing class from 9 am to 3 pm today. That’s 6 hours! Can you believe it? Actually the class takes place daily from 9 am to noon, but due to the fact that I work so slowly, the drawing of a glass vase wasn’t finished, so I stayed and worked on it. Well, truth be told, I stayed and watched my teacher do it. Hahahaha. When he saw that I was really stuck and had no idea anymore, he told me that actually today I was supposed to be learning to draw cloth, but he forgot and went ahead and taught me a glass. That explains why I was so stuck. We skipped a step! Anyway, he worked on it and I watched him do it so as to learn the skills. He said next Monday we’ll work on cloth and then the glass afterwards. :)

So I’ve been drawing since last Wednesday. Why? Because it’s always been something I loved doing privately but am embarrassed to do publicly. I have so many phobias, and I’m 18, so I thought that maybe I’ll start getting rid of them. You know, not all at once, but work on them, fix them slowly but constantly. This was actually a good start, so I went and signed up a class and there we go. You might wonder why I’m embarrassed to draw in other people’s presence. Well, let me flashback. When you were kids I’m sure you loved drawing too. I mean, how could all kids not? There’s nothing much to do when you’re kids. Anyway, I loved drawing. I drew every day. I drew cartoon characters and stuff like that. I did it pretty well too! But then I had some problems improving. I did NOT improve at all from that level. I couldn’t draw anything else, basically. I grew up, had art classes in school, and was extremely miserable. You know, when you look around you and everyone’s doing it so well and you look at the piece of paper in front of you and only see crap? I was so, so, so miserable. I remember when I was in 9th grade and we were assigned Interior Design work. My classmates did it so well; drawing and painting. I couldn’t even make my lines straight without a ruler, and my drawings didn’t even make sense; it was so twisted and everything looked crippled. Then someone passed by my desk and looked at my work and didn’t say anything, looked at my best friend’s and said something like, “Oh it’s so great! You’re so good at it!” and everyone got up from their desk to come and have a look. That was the moment I felt so pathetic and wished I wasn’t there at all. I guess it was from that moment on that I’ve had problems drawing in others’ presence.

Enough about my sad past! This class is so far so good. I can feel myself becoming better at drawing every day (except today ’cause I failed). There are also some that I’d done in my own free time before I signed up for the class. They are kind of pointless, really. Haha. I took pictures of the drawings I did in class too and thought I might post them here. :D Come and have a look!